I think people should start throwing away the cliché: “Back in my/our days”. I’m not kidding, even though I am seldom serious.
Recent years, I have been seeing increasing number of people, largely those born in the 1980s (also those with a little celebrity status), using this phrase as if there are a lot to share about being born in that era. Come on, people, what’s with that haughtiness cowering behind the face of fake humility?
Of all the “back in my/our days”, the most common ones I notice are:
1) Back in those days, we watch TV programs from a box-shaped television.
2) Back in those days, videos came in a cassette called VHS.
3) Back in my time, we play GameBoys/Nintendos/Sega Saturn/our own dicks without lub, and multi-player wasn’t available.
4) Back in those days, we had no (insert bullshit here).
Funny how of all the BIMDs (back in my days), no one (or few) is brave enough to talk about the fact that porn was also from hard copies? Didn’t anyone remember that in order to admire something erotic, we (too bad, Singapore didn’t have them) have to check out Playboy magazines? Why don’t we start by saying, “Back in those days, I had to wait for my parents to be screwing in the room before I could watch videos of others screwing on the couch.”?
Does anyone remember that we needed to rewind the cassettes before we could watch them, and if there was a part in the video that we loved, say the part where the grandma ate the toad, we had to rewind it by estimating how many seconds of “acceleration” to how many minutes that would bring us back? We depended a lot on our ears for that actually.
Ah, yes, also the “rewind while playback” function that we could use to see people vomit back pastas on the spoon before putting them back into the bowl, and walk backwards so that they could make water float back to the tap. No sound would be heard.
I have a suggestion here: Stop all these shit.
You see, as we are enjoying the convenience of technology, you people are at the same time comparing to the past where your buttons were only Full Rewind, Full Forward, Rewind, Forward, Play, Record, Eject, and your nipples. Are you hating or enjoying inventions? Are you appreciating the past or the present? Life’s better now or in the past? Which is which?
It’s good to reminisce, and sometimes, nostalgia makes one appreciate the years he/she spent. It can be nice when you are alone in the dark room with one hand on your…. never mind. But too much of BIMDs is making you an entirely different person in the eyes of your peers or the next generation, and the word is asshole.
No one really cares what your gadgets were 10 years ago, and no one really cares if Justin Bieber couldn’t speak when you were enjoying your era’s pop music. You never liked having to know that back in your parents/grandparents’ days, they had sex every evening because there was no technology for entertainment, and why are you now shoving your CRT TVs down the throats of youngsters, whom some of which were born in the 1990s?
I’m not ranting. I just think this needs to slow down, if not stop. Your wisdom doesn’t show from the BIMDs, but from the words that come out from your mouth. You’re only showing that you are not able to move ahead with all those “Damn, back in my days, I could buy a car with few hundred bucks.”
Back in those days, average salary was also few hundred bucks a month, dumbass.
Andy Lawson is the average man on the street that you’ll not even trouble yourself looking at him if he passes by you. He’s sensitive to bullshit, and he hates mediocrity in most people.
He is the author of his self-published book: Facts and Fiction of Fengshui: Facts that Masters are NOT Telling You.
He doesn’t have Facebook or Twitter, because he hates to be associated with people who tend to be passive-aggressive online, but he does have a very limited set of vocabularies, terrible grammar, a twisted mind that makes himself God in his own twisted world and an ability to communicate with people who wish to be his friend.